everything else
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Never ending sorrow
Genny, as most girls, fell deeply in love with a boy who promised her the world. She had not yet grown out of daydreaming about living happily ever after, and she truly believed that her then boyfriend, Dexter Horne, was to be her prince Charming. But then one day, at 18 years old, she realized her period was late, and it wasn’t until she had taken the pregnancy test that she realized it was too a test of her relationship. Because once the stick had told her everything she had ever wanted to hear, she sat Dexter down and told him the news. At first, he was terrified, but as they spoke about raising a child and having a future together, he too became excited about having the baby, and she could tell he really wanted the child. Genny fell asleep in his arms, happier and more in love than ever, but when she woke up, the bed was cold, and he was gone. He had left her with nothing except a note saying “I’m sorry”. Though her heart was broken beyond repair, Genny was still determined to have the baby and raise it on her own. As her belly started to show, she found herself comforted by the love she felt for her unborn child which too grew day by day. But then one day, when she was only a few months along, she woke up in the middle of the night, screaming and writhing in pain. Something was wrong. And even before looking under the covers, she knew within herself what had happened. A miscarriage. Her heart shattered anew, the breakup a mere scrape on the knee in comparison. She never recovered.
When Genny lost her baby, she also lost her way.
The life she had planned and dreamed of was now buried in the dirt, and she had no idea what to do with her life. Ever since, she has been living in a daze. The pregnancy has not left any marks on her beautiful, slender body - it was like it had never even happened - and so she found work in modeling. Even though the industry disgusted her to her very core, she told herself it made her happy. But whenever she was left alone with her thoughts for too long, that deep rooted sadness welled up inside her, and that is why she found her escape in partying and doing drugs; anything to keep her away from reality. And so, she pretends to be a shallow and empty model living her best life, when really, she is always two seconds away from falling apart. She has been doing it for so long that she no longer remembers who she is. She has a lot of one night stands and uses people as an escape, either for sex or for drugs.
On the inside, she is extremely fragile and emotional which is why she keeps everyone at an arm’s length - or tries to, at least. Because despite her efforts, she does fall in love pretty easily and care for people way more than she should. However, she never lets herself commit to a person in fear of being left again and the memories that would surely well up once more. She no longer believes in happily ever after. Her impeccable sweetness and charm add to the naïve model-persona, but it is genuine nonetheless, and she really is a most loyal friend if you get close to her. This is also the reason why she tends to find herself in some pretty uncomfortable situations. With her job comes a lot of unpleasant people who tend to take advantage of Genny, and she is too despairing to do anything about it, so she simply lets them. Her life feels completely out of her hands, and so she just goes wherever the wind blows her. An existence, but not a life.
